An Intelligent Ego
Growing an intelligent ego. Is it possible?
I just read recently a post by Steve Pavlina on How to Build a Stronger Ego.
I highly encourage you to read it before you go any further in order to participate in the conversation afterwords.
His post seemed to fly in the face of my beliefs surrounding Ego, however it also felt right too. Below is a post from a few years ago that I wrote for my first blog. I’ve tweaked it a bit and updated it to reflect this new perspective:
When we say “I” or “me”, we are referring to our Ego. It is our perception of ourselves. Egos are only different on the surface from person to person but deep down they all have the same intent I believe.
The Ego’s Intent
Here is what I mean by that. Ego is constantly struggling for survival. The concept of ego cannot survive along with the concept of consciousness. Or can it? I believe it can but it’s our conscious intent that makes the difference. (Sounds a lot like character doesn’t it?)
Actions that may get in the way:
- Criticizing When we criticize another group or individual it makes us (the “I”) feel superior. That is our ego hard at work creating separation. Even criticizing other people’s unconsciousness is not to be judged so that you feel superior. This is something I struggled with as I’ve made my journey into awareness.
- Complaining Like criticizing, complaining is a story that our mind makes up that supports our separation from others as well. Complaining or creating negative labels about others creates more separation I’m starting to figure out, that without this separation, the ego can not survive.
- Resentment Resentment is the next level of complaining. When you resent things about others no matter what it is, your ego loves it. It creates more separation from others and supports the ego even further. We have a dysfunction of our collective consciousness when we judge while going through the process of becoming aware.
To me I perceive this to mean I’m not able to tap into my full potential of collective consciousness if I’m judging others who are a part of that very same collective consciousness.
The more judgment in my language the more internal and exterior dysfunction I experience. Hence the more I support my ego in a negative way. Many people simply have unconditioned unconsciousness. They simply don’t know what they don’t know. Are they lacking emotional intelligence?
“In order to live consciously, you’ll often need to release socially conditioned habits and behaviors that don’t serve you.“-Steve Pavlina
So be patient with others for this reason. They don’t know what they don’t know.
Intelligently Respond
Do your best to consciously respond to situations rather than react. Reflect love to people rather than judgment or disdain. I choose to believe my world is a mirror. You judge in others what you most see in yourself.
“The people and situations that ‘trigger’ you (cause you some sort of upset, discontent, anger, rage, suffering) are the ones who teach you – they are the gifts in your life – make them some cake and be happy they are here to teach you a deeper truth about yourself! (if you are willing)”-Jana Fleming
Just realize the ego does not like change and it will pull many tricks to keep you from a state of awareness.
Can Awareness and ego co-exist? Is struggle the ego resisting change?
Are you resisting as you read this? That may be ego. But is it the ego’s intent that is mal-purposed and not so much just the general idea of the ego? Steve’s post really made me ponder this thought and I continue to.
People who are easily offended never run out of ways to be offended. They are addicted to being upset or angry. Through reacting to these concepts they re-enforce their (negative) ego’s survival. They get to be right, there for their ego keeps them from change. The ego wants to make others wrong so we are right. The Ego wins at the cost of our happiness.
Your Intelligent Response
As I’m sure you are starting to understand, you can intelligently respond to these kinds of situations by being objective rather than reacting. Investigate your past grievances but realize the past has no power in keeping you from being in the moment unless you choose to let it.
Although the speed of this recovery shortens with all of my work.
Other wise I love you is my favorite let it go phrase now. It all comes full circle for me when I remember the saying, “let go and let god.” I choose to relate this to, “Be one with the collective consciousness.”
This idea compliments the other acronym for ego which is Edging God Out.
So what do you think?
After reading Steve’s post and now this one, do you believe it’s possible to live with an intelligent ego? Is it possible that the difference between a good or bad ego is intent?
I’m very curious to hear your thoughts & feelings on the matter.
![Reblog this post [with Zemanta]](http://img.zemanta.com/reblog_e.png?x-id=e7dc8209-9c5c-448c-a152-a0c6319964d3)
I went thru Steve’s blog and to me it seams that his main message is that getting rid of your ego in turns gets rid of your “drive” or your ability to accomplish. I feel it’s the exact opposite to avoid discipline or to avoid challenges is to add to your ego. Because in turn you are still attached to a role and your fear of what ever is keeping you from doing those things.
” The acceptance of suffering or (discipline in this case) creates enlightenment because as you accept the ego that created the suffering begins to erode allowing your true self to come to light & your joy to be pure” CN
I feel intelligence can be substituted for awareness. In that an intelligent Ego is one that is aware of it self, acceptance itself, and allows itself to demish as spiritual, fin, & physical growth occurs in ones life.
I went thru Steve’s blog and to me it seams that his main message is that getting rid of your ego in turns gets rid of your “drive” or your ability to accomplish. I feel it’s the exact opposite to avoid discipline or to avoid challenges is to add to your ego. Because in turn you are still attached to a role and your fear of what ever is keeping you from doing those things.
” The acceptance of suffering or (discipline in this case) creates enlightenment because as you accept the ego that created the suffering begins to erode allowing your true self to come to light & your joy to be pure” CN
I feel intelligence can be substituted for awareness. In that an intelligent Ego is one that is aware of it self, acceptance itself, and allows itself to demish as spiritual, fin, & physical growth occurs in ones life.
Thanks for sharing you insights brother. It’s a very interesting question I propose in the post. Let’s see if anyone else has to contribute before I get into this much deeper. It’s a deep question but one with a simple answer. We just need to know where to look 😉
Thanks for sharing you insights brother. It’s a very interesting question I propose in the post. Let’s see if anyone else has to contribute before I get into this much deeper. It’s a deep question but one with a simple answer. We just need to know where to look 😉
I’ll try and avoid the word.
I’m in favour of my survival and yours. I don’t see this as a problem.
In our physical form we are dependent and need to discriminate (food from poison). I am in favour of this.
I would like to reduce the amount of pain and suffering in the world. I favour medical and other advances (such as public sanitation) that do this. In the West, where for most of us our environment is fairly hygenic and healthy food is usually available, much suffering is due to our thoughts, feelings and relationships.
It seems to me that the choices I make can make a meaningful difference to my experience (not total but substantial none the less).
I find that there is a part of me that observes reactions by other parts of me. I find that I can get better at this and change my reactions over time. I find that as I become at home with the parts of me I dislike that I am less triggered by others who show these parts in their behaviour.
A quibble. We are in the present, we don’t create this so much as realise it. Memories, plans, fears, triggers are all occur here and now.
Thanks for raising such a stimulating and important topic Tony.
I’ll try and avoid the word.
I’m in favour of my survival and yours. I don’t see this as a problem.
In our physical form we are dependent and need to discriminate (food from poison). I am in favour of this.
I would like to reduce the amount of pain and suffering in the world. I favour medical and other advances (such as public sanitation) that do this. In the West, where for most of us our environment is fairly hygenic and healthy food is usually available, much suffering is due to our thoughts, feelings and relationships.
It seems to me that the choices I make can make a meaningful difference to my experience (not total but substantial none the less).
I find that there is a part of me that observes reactions by other parts of me. I find that I can get better at this and change my reactions over time. I find that as I become at home with the parts of me I dislike that I am less triggered by others who show these parts in their behaviour.
A quibble. We are in the present, we don’t create this so much as realise it. Memories, plans, fears, triggers are all occur here and now.
Thanks for raising such a stimulating and important topic Tony.
Wow, amazing feedback and insight Evan! I love the “memories, plans, fears, triggers are all occurrences here and now.” Very powerful!
Wow, amazing feedback and insight Evan! I love the “memories, plans, fears, triggers are all occurrences here and now.” Very powerful!