Of all of the things I’ve discovered to improve my quality of life and those I work with, it’s been perspective that has made the biggest difference. It’s perspective that people pay me for when it comes to coaching or marketing consulting.
It hasn’t been the money, cars, day trips to the spa or any of the many vacations I’ve been on. These have been results of my perspective but they haven’t been responsible for my happiness.
There are 3 keys area’s I’ve found to applying perspective that can support you in creating a better quality of life for yourself and the world around you.
Your Perspective of Yourself
It’s how I see myself which has made the biggest direct impact on the quality of life I experience today.
I can say this because at one time I had a horrible self image and my life demonstrated it.
All I had to do was look at my health, my finances and my relationships. The truth can seem harsh but is often fair.
How I see myself today is something so called successful people have in common. When I say successful, I’m not just pointing to people with big houses, nice cars and fat bank accounts. I’m talking about what you would consider successful.
- Do you have a happy marriage or intimate relationship?
- A great relationship with your kids or your siblings?
- Do you have friends that you know you could call at 2:00 am if the rubber meets the road and you absolutely needed their support?
- Do you have enough money put aside to live comfortably?
- Is your health relatively in good shape and you have the energy to contribute value every day?
Consider yourself successful then.
How you see yourself can be a directly related to your hierarchy of values also.
Chances are, if you have these kinds of relationships in your life, you value relationships highly and probably pour into them what you’re getting out. Relationships take work, just like your relationship with your bank account does. You also value security (which money put aside would represent).
The other key thing to note here is this, you probably see yourself as able to provide value in these peoples lives.
The bottom line is I believe there is a lot of truth in the quote:
“You can’t outperform your own self image.” – Dan Kennedy
The more love, empathy and compassion you have for yourself, the more you can provide for others. There is a direct relationship to how you see yourself and what your life currently demonstrates.
Your Perspective of People
Speaking of others, it’s your perspective of other people which will also have a direct impact on your quality of life. Unless you live in a cave and don’t interact with people, chances are you engage in communication daily with others.
The quality of this communication likely comes down to 1. how you see yourself and more importantly how you view others. I have a philosophy of you can’t see in others what you don’t see in yourself. Otherwise how would you be able to identify it?
This perspective of mine is one that keeps me from coming unglued when someone seems to attack me or fire off emotionally at me. I already know if they are coming from love or from fear. Both emotions seeming to be the root of all others. I can choose to come from love or from fear as well. This is a conscious choice on my behalf these days and I can assure you, it has kept me from saying stupid shit that I’d probably regret on many of occasions. Thus harming these relationships.
My perspective of others, is that they are doing the best they can with what they are conscious of. I can choose to contribute to this consciousness or not.
I can choose to hold others in my heart, regardless of their behaviors or I can choose to spit back the same vile fear, hate or disrespect they may be dishing out. Don’t get me wrong, I get triggered and pissed just the same as anyone at times. However how long I hold onto this emotion before I move through it is much much quicker than ever before. What may have taken me days now only takes me an hour or even minutes.
[note color=”#7893d6″]I realize these people are simply providing me a gift. They are revealing to me my own stuff that I may have yet to resolve within myself. When I cease to be triggered by their actions or words, and view them as spiritual beings having a human experience, I can acknowledge I’m coming from a loving place. A place of compassion and empathy.[/note]
Why? Because my perspective of others is a direct reflection of how I view myself.
Yup, WAY different perspective but one which works for me these days.
The quality of your communication with others can dictate just how happy you remain in your environment (like your home, your work place or home business environment such as at live events and meetings)
Take an inventory of your current relationships both personally and professionally. Then ask yourself, what does your current perspective demonstrate?
Your Perspective of the World and Your Role In It
Your perspective of the world and your role in it directly ties into the type of work you find yourself doing and how you’re contributing to the world.
Again, your life demonstrates this truth right now.
Contribution is one of the 6 primary human drivers. If you’re not contributing in a way that is meaningful to you, your life will reflect it and you’ll find your attempting to fill this hole with something else. Be it food, sex, porn, drugs or whatever other distraction you can create.
Where depression comes in is when people feel they are forced to live with something they don’t want. Hence why so many people are unhappy with the kind of work they are doing. They have become aware they feel forced to do something they don’t want to do anymore but of course they have to pay their bills, mortgage, car payments and save for the kids college tuition.
They are trying to live a projected fantasy of what their piers or the media says they are to live….and it’s causing a conflict.
- What is your current perspective of the world
- How could you begin to leave this world a better place than you’ve found it?
- What would this better place look like to you? Describe it and picture it in your mind.
- How could “you” contribute to this picture starting today?
- What is your role in providing value in this new world?
- Sounds a like purpose to me.
Purpose isn’t something you achieve, it’s something you live. There is no end to it.
Perspective can be your greatest agent of change. I know I’ve made what some people would consider radical changes to mine over the years. However I’m happier, healthier and feeling as if I’m contributing more value than ever.
Have questions or simply want to share your perspective? Share in the comments below and please share this via Facebook, Twitter or simply email it to someone you feel would gain a new perspective from it. 🙂
Great post. The world is indeed a mirror. I was listening to a call and it talked about similar topic in which the few needle movers is what we hire coaches for. The few things that can make the biggest differance in our life/business, which most of the time are right in front of our faces but we require some one on the outside looking in to help us step back, look, and say ah-ha!
Tony Teegarden says
So true man. It’s hard can be very difficult at times to “Operate” on ourselves. Surgeons don’t do it for obvious reasons. For this reason it’s good to have a coach!