Setting Up Life’s Outcomes
Doing the thing when no one is looking is called Character. Doing the thing and not caring what anyone else is thinking is called flow. I loved this guest post from ZenHabits on the concept of Creative Flow.
My work flow when I write is based on not giving a damn what people think about my writing. That usually doesn’t happen until I’m about to push the publish button then of course I do it anyway. But whether it’s writing, playing a sport or playing a musical instrument, we all have desired outcomes we seek.
Or do we?
Following Flow Without Fear
As a musician and especially as a young teen (I was 13 when I started guitar) I wasn’t so much concerned with what anyone thought of my playing as I was wrapped up in my own self expression. The music I created was an extension of much more than just my emotions. It reflected my self identification.
For many artists this is what happens for them as well. Painters, photographers, musicians and writers all have it common. Their craft is an extension of their self identification.
For some people their background is very technical and they consciously & purposely sought out the skills to fully express themselves through a trade. For some it was more a natural progression of expression that didn’t require technical knowledge of their craft at all or it was a combination of both.
Whether they seek character validation from their work/art is to each his own.
These individuals you could say are living their purpose regardless of the starving artist title you may think have, they don’t see it. (That is probably only your perspective anyway and also a good indicator you’re living in outcome) They are quite happy doing what they do. Flow.
They don’t “set it up” in many cases. There is of course the many people who would desire riches for doing their work. There are just as many happy being able to keep the necessities of life (electric & food) in order to maintain their passion.
You’re the Creator of Your Outcomes
This one is a touchy subject so let me be clear about something. I had someone on Twitter early last year ask me, “So you’re telling me an abused child chooses to be abused?”
Absolutely not.
I’m just saying that eventually as a young teen or adult we would want to start taking responsibility for how we perceive our outcomes. If you can look back as a mature adult today and say, “I am still allowing things from my past to define me in a negative way today,” then it’s never too late to be who you are today.
“It’s our determined character that defines our flow.“-Me
- It’s time to believe you’re the powerful creator of your outcomes
- You emotionally assign the outcome.
- You define the meaning they have.
We are the powerful co-creator and you and I have to believe that.
We assign meaning to whatever happens in our life even if we don’t feel we created the circumstances of which we find ourselves in.
Example: I’m not sure the Jew’s manifested the holocaust by any means. But this is an example of why Victor Frankl can go through the experience of a Nazi concentration camp and not be destroyed spiritually. He assigned a meaning and didn’t let the circumstances define his spiritual outcome.
Man’s Search For Meaning is a fantastic book that outlines the power of the human spirit and how you or I could define our life’s experience in such a way that serves us.
I wrote this post and part 1 immediately after writing my post My Arrested Development and a Shocking Discovery. (I do most all of my writing on Sunday in one sitting) Obviously I’m not clinically diagnosed with any severe clinical arrested development. My point was to fully experience my emotions. Fully embrace it, exercise it (here at the blog) and then determine what I’m going to have all of this mean.
What will you make your life mean?
How are you defining yourself based on your outcomes?
Are you coming from shadow or are you coming from light when you come to these conclusions?
We can conclude our personal perceptions and define them in a way that empowers us. Is that what you’re doing?
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Hey Tony!
Very nice site you have here, I found it through your post on goodlifezen 🙂
Just thought I’d say hi 🙂
Cheers
Diggy
TONY:
I think I have ben following your writings for close to a year now & I think the Last week or so has been a real EPIPHANY for you,,,yes this is a real Milestone,,,By bringing your shadow into the light & sharing with the World your ‘MESS” you have as you say made a determined outcome & I believe for you that is not to be bested or a victim of some very negative past experiences BUT rather to come out Stronger & Better to totally unstop the PIPE that is Tony Teegarden so you can FLOW out to the world with all your beauty & ability,,,I am immensely enjoying the ride Brother you have LEVERAGED a new dimension of POWER!! God Bless YOU! The World Today needs more men & women to ‘Make a BOld Move’ as you have. Here is to doing that!
I love you Brother! I feel honored & humbled to have a relationship with you! I am excited to see where we will all FLOW with this!!
The Great Matt Geib
TONY:
I think I have ben following your writings for close to a year now & I think the Last week or so has been a real EPIPHANY for you,,,yes this is a real Milestone,,,By bringing your shadow into the light & sharing with the World your ‘MESS” you have as you say made a determined outcome & I believe for you that is not to be bested or a victim of some very negative past experiences BUT rather to come out Stronger & Better to totally unstop the PIPE that is Tony Teegarden so you can FLOW out to the world with all your beauty & ability,,,I am immensely enjoying the ride Brother you have LEVERAGED a new dimension of POWER!! God Bless YOU! The World Today needs more men & women to ‘Make a BOld Move’ as you have. Here is to doing that!
I love you Brother! I feel honored & humbled to have a relationship with you! I am excited to see where we will all FLOW with this!!
The Great Matt Geib
Matt, Thanks a lot man. It means a lot to have someone standing outside of my experience (especially over the past year) to see the growth I’ve experienced. I love how you said “flow out to the world with all your beauty and ability.” Well said my friend. Thanks so much for your love & support Matt. You continue to bring out and see the best in me. Thank you brother!
Matt, Thanks a lot man. It means a lot to have someone standing outside of my experience (especially over the past year) to see the growth I’ve experienced. I love how you said “flow out to the world with all your beauty and ability.” Well said my friend. Thanks so much for your love & support Matt. You continue to bring out and see the best in me. Thank you brother!
Hey brother thanks a lot! I appreciate you stopping by and sharing your feedback! Very cool of you. I just checked out Upgradereality.com and you got lots of killer info there on personal development! Thanks again!
Hey brother thanks a lot! I appreciate you stopping by and sharing your feedback! Very cool of you. I just checked out Upgradereality.com and you got lots of killer info there on personal development! Thanks again!
Hi Tony, I think meaning can be ‘discovered’ as well as ‘assigned’. While I think there is lots of room for play I don’t think we can make any experience mean anything (the idea that we can I find worrying).
I’m not disagreeing with the importance of meaning.
I wonder if it was me who made the remark about abused children on Twitter, I don’t remember but it sounds like the kinds of thing I can say.
As Viktor Frankl found a sense of meaning can be a life or death issue. And as the Whitehall Studies found (my interpretation) a sense of agency is a major influence on our health. Many thanks for this post.
Hi Tony, I think meaning can be ‘discovered’ as well as ‘assigned’. While I think there is lots of room for play I don’t think we can make any experience mean anything (the idea that we can I find worrying).
I’m not disagreeing with the importance of meaning.
I wonder if it was me who made the remark about abused children on Twitter, I don’t remember but it sounds like the kinds of thing I can say.
As Viktor Frankl found a sense of meaning can be a life or death issue. And as the Whitehall Studies found (my interpretation) a sense of agency is a major influence on our health. Many thanks for this post.
I agree with you Evan in the fact that the meaning can be discovered as well as assigned. I’m curious why you would find the fact worrying that a person can make any (not all) experiences mean something. Aren’t we assigning meaning all the time to our experiences, just unconsciously? I would think it would be a sign of emotional intelligence and a healthy thing to have the ability to define more consciously our outcomes.
By the way it wasn’t you that made the reference about child abuse although I agree that that would have definitely sounded like something you’d mention. I do find you to be a voice of reason in many cases. (There is nothing wrong with that fyi, just an observation)
Love your feedback to my question just to help clarify what would worry you. Thanks!
I agree with you Evan in the fact that the meaning can be discovered as well as assigned. I’m curious why you would find the fact worrying that a person can make any (not all) experiences mean something. Aren’t we assigning meaning all the time to our experiences, just unconsciously? I would think it would be a sign of emotional intelligence and a healthy thing to have the ability to define more consciously our outcomes.
By the way it wasn’t you that made the reference about child abuse although I agree that that would have definitely sounded like something you’d mention. I do find you to be a voice of reason in many cases. (There is nothing wrong with that fyi, just an observation)
Love your feedback to my question just to help clarify what would worry you. Thanks!
Hi Tony, I may have expressed myself badly.
My concern is that people who have had really awful experiences being told to ‘think differently about them and it will be OK”. I think this kind of insensitivity is motivated by the fear of having to deal with other’s awful experiences. I understand the motive I think but still think the advice is awfully insensitive.
I don’t mean that you are advocating this, but I do want to guard against it.
Hi Tony, I may have expressed myself badly.
My concern is that people who have had really awful experiences being told to ‘think differently about them and it will be OK”. I think this kind of insensitivity is motivated by the fear of having to deal with other’s awful experiences. I understand the motive I think but still think the advice is awfully insensitive.
I don’t mean that you are advocating this, but I do want to guard against it.
Ahh ok now I understand and I absolutely agree Evan. Traumatic experiences can and usually do require professional assistance 1st and foremost. I for one did have almost 3 years of professional psychiatric help after my child abuse at the age of 8. I was definitely traumatized and I to this day believe it is one of the reasons I’ve had the ability and desire to go within. My curse was my blessing I’d say. it taught me much about identifying the anger, hurt and resentment I felt and exploring my feelings.
I had just pulled out my Maxwell Maltz Psycho-Cybernetics CD’s to listen to again and came across a great review of the book at http://bit.ly/9AO2Na I found something that ties directly with what we’re talking about. In the comments section of that post Marelisa says that Maxwell left out one important thing, to go within, identify and “remove” the negative self image causes. (beliefs & emotions surrounding the causes of the negative self image) I completely agree. Telling someone they can simply “think differently” and it’s all going to be ok is absolutely naive and would be irresponsible of someone to suggest as a “cure all” This blog is for the more so healthy individual looking to go within explore and optimize the self who is here and now so i absolutely wouldn’t advocate insensitive advice and I’m glad you realize that. I appreciate your feedback and again the voice of reason makes sense. Thanks much my friend.
Ahh ok now I understand and I absolutely agree Evan. Traumatic experiences can and usually do require professional assistance 1st and foremost. I for one did have almost 3 years of professional psychiatric help after my child abuse at the age of 8. I was definitely traumatized and I to this day believe it is one of the reasons I’ve had the ability and desire to go within. My curse was my blessing I’d say. it taught me much about identifying the anger, hurt and resentment I felt and exploring my feelings.
I had just pulled out my Maxwell Maltz Psycho-Cybernetics CD’s to listen to again and came across a great review of the book at http://bit.ly/9AO2Na I found something that ties directly with what we’re talking about. In the comments section of that post Marelisa says that Maxwell left out one important thing, to go within, identify and “remove” the negative self image causes. (beliefs & emotions surrounding the causes of the negative self image) I completely agree. Telling someone they can simply “think differently” and it’s all going to be ok is absolutely naive and would be irresponsible of someone to suggest as a “cure all” This blog is for the more so healthy individual looking to go within explore and optimize the self who is here and now so i absolutely wouldn’t advocate insensitive advice and I’m glad you realize that. I appreciate your feedback and again the voice of reason makes sense. Thanks much my friend.