Did I Really?
I realize this may not paint me in the most flattering light however I give you both sides of me here. There is much to learn in our dualities and I’m not one to run from either.
I used to say when I screw up, I screw up big. But that would be a another phrase, revealing another philosophy for another blog post. You’ll know what I mean when you get done reading this post.
So I was on the phone yesterday with someone I was talking to for the very first time.
The conversation was good, there was a definite connection within the conversation of being on the same vibe of interests.
We were on the topics of spiritualism, personal education interests and business.
Everything was quite enjoyable.
Then it happened.
Or I should say I created it.
I made the comment, “When it comes to people breaking out of the mold of a 9-5, they won’t do it regardless of the positive possibilities. With some folks you just can’t fix stupid.”
Shit, did I say that for real?
Is that just a wee bit condescending and judgmental?
Ok, it was a lot.
Fact is I’ve made that statement for the past few years. I know I picked it up from the industry I was in prior. There was a lot of antagonist leaders who don’t really see it as assisting people with gaining more freedom from their 9-5’s but more as if the prospect wouldn’t make the shift for fear of there not being any security in a home based business or buy said product, they were deemed as stupid.
When the person wouldn’t take action (Or made excuses) even when there was a positive possibility they were deemed as stupid.
Hence the statement, you can’t fix stupid.
Now that I write it out and read it myself I realize just how much of an asshole I must have come across as in the past. Without judgment I really discovered just how much that statement created a separation between myself and others.
Coming to Consciousness
Luckily the person I was talking to called me on it (In an ever so smooth way)
She actually laughed slightly (almost an uncomfortable laugh) and just said she couldn’t possibly think of people in that way and that she does the very best she can to shield herself from such thought or people who think that way. (Ouch, big hint)
She said she chooses not to judge people in such a manner and she chooses to believe that people are doing the best that they can with what they have to work with in the moment.
“If someone hasn’t read what you’ve read, seen what you’ve seen, heard what you’ve heard or experienced what you’ve experienced don’t expect them to have the same perspective as you.” -Frank AuCoin
How many times have I said that quote to myself but yet I still made the statement?
I didn’t feel judged by this other person either. (Practicing what she preaches) I just felt that she was stating her perspective from a sincere point of view and I picked it up loud and clear.
I’m blessed that I was called on it even if indirectly because I believe this is one of those phrases that I have allowed to be ingrained in my subconscious that was just running on auto pilot. It has me curious what other stuff I still have to expunge from my thoughts?
How much other separation have I created?
I didn’t go into resistance on the matter because I knew what she was saying resonated with me even as uncomfortable as I felt. I started to want to defend the statement just out of a knee jerk reaction but I surrendered instead and thanked her for her perspective in a round about way.
Self Judgment Be Gone
Fact is I didn’t really realize how much that statement was a philosophy. One that I’ve said out loud too many times.
It’s a philosophy of which I didn’t realize was probably keeping me from connecting with more people on a deeper level. Although I admit I’ve been much more conscious of it than before. I required a reminder and I’m grateful for it.
I started to be upset with myself afterwords but chose not to go into judgment. I chose to reflect on the experience with gratitude.
That isn’t something I probably wouldn’t have done in the past.
I can assure you the experience was a bit painful in the moment (Don’t worry, my ego was the only thing that got hurt) however it happened exactly as it should and I’m positive the phrase will never utter from my lips again.
At least the equation worked for me in the situation. Could it possibly work for you when you find yourself in resistance of a certain experience?
I’m still discovering things about myself that I feel I must let go of and not be in judgment of so that I free up more energy to use in a positive fashion. I choose to realize these are moments of clarity to be grateful of.
I realize there are philosophies that not everyone is going to agree with and I’ll get resistance on. But this was a phrase where it’s clear to me it’s created a lot of separation between myself and good energy.
- Have you found yourself using phrases that have revealed a certain philosophy?
- Can you think of one right off the top of your head right now?
- Is it one that serves you and others or does it separate you from others?
I wouldn’t dwell on the subject terribly hard, but over the next week maybe carry around some 3×5 cards and write down phrases that you use and spend a moment to reflect on what they reveal about your thoughts and philosophies.
One of my secrets is that I always carry around 3×5 cards to jot down ideas that come to me, quotes that jump out in my head or to write down books or sites that someone suggests.
I’ll be adding my own phrases that I catch myself using and reflecting on them to further explore my thoughts & philosophies and confirm if they serve me and others or separate my from others.
What about you?